Growing Pains

Growing up isn't something you enjoy

Unless you're, like,

Five,

And the world is still golden,

And you can't see

The hourglass

And the grains of sand

Falling

Falling

F    A      L      L       I        N      G

To the bottom

Slowly

But when you get older

Even in sixth grade

Which is still relatively young in my opinion

You start to feel it

A little pang

As each invisible grain of sand

Falls

And the clock ticks

Slowly

But too fast

Unstoppable.

There's no slowing down once it's sped up.

Time moves faster

The older you get

And once you feel it spinning out of control

Racing down the racetrack that is your life

Faster and faster

Once you feel that

Once you're old enough to

It doesn't slow down

It just keeps going

Faster

And faster

And faster.

Summers that once felt like they lasted years

Are now gone in the blink of an eye and a smear of soft serve and sunblock.

Winters that used to stretch on forever

Are now a snowflake or two

And shovels

And snow boots and coats

Condensed

Into what feels like just a few days.

Nothing is long enough anymore.

And autumn

Or fall

Or whatever you call it

Has never been long enough

But now it's a flash

The shortest season

Has become a swipe of amber

Gold

Leaves

Falling

Laughter

Pumpkins

Crisp, cold air

Wind

And then the clouds roll in and winter's there

And the seasons have passed you by again.

So you look back, trying to live in the moment

And you think about where you used to be

Where you are now

Comparing the two

Searching for reassurance in time's icy grip

Searching for warmth

Like, "I am better at this now than I was last year"

Or

"I have made more friends this year than I did last year"

Or

Your useless New Year's resolutions that you will stop eating so many chips

You will be better

You will be a better sister

Or classmate

Or student.

Time is so fast

And nowadays it's hard not to feel the pains

The growing pains

When you think of how good everything was

And how now it's not quite.