I kneel down on the dewy grass, picking up a ladybug by the hand.
The ladybug and I are still as the rain starts to pour down on us. I smile gently as it flies away. “There goes another” I say to myself.
“You know, if you took that chance. You wouldn’t be here right now.”
I know, it’s true. Yet I don’t want to believe it.
I know I should’ve said something to her before she left. But there was nothing to say. At least, I thought. In that moment.
Yet, why do I want to go back in time? To say something. Anything.
But even if I truly wanted to. I can’t.
So why does my heart ache?
Why do I want to scream?
I wish I said something. Anything.
But I can’t.
Why didn’t I say something?
Why didn’t I tell her I cared?
Why did I have to put on a mean face?
Why was a so cruel?
But she’s Dead, I have to live with that reality.
Even if it kills me.
Posted in response to the challenge Should've.