Guilty Pleasures

Guilty pleasures.

I know they are.

I know I shouldn't.

I know all this.

Do I listen?

No.

Have I ever listened?

No.

Checking the doc.

Not active anymore.

Hadn't been

Til I had to beg you

And now it's still not.

Writing my fanfics.

Most of them completely wrong

But they help me think through things, right?

Or do they just make me crazy?

Sneaking onto my email.

Almost an obsession.

Rarely any unread messages

And I only really care

If they're from him.

Ignoring schoolwork.

Who cares anyway?

I don't need to understand math.

I don't plan to be a carpenter.

"But a musician has to do a ton of math..."

Whatever.

I don't want to.

I keep ignoring it.

Guilty pleasures -

All my problems,

But ways of coping.

I shouldn't

But I do.

QueenBee

VT

13 years old

More by QueenBee

  • Glimpses

    Noise

    Warming up

    Keys

    Fingerings

    Chatter

    Laughter

    The chorale

    Stopping

    Starting

    "Again"

    "I know you can do better than that"

    Serious but

    You also love it

  • Cornered

    Cornered

    I put my hands up

    Like you taught me

    Only now

    You're the one attacking

    "Helping" because

    You "just want me to feel better"

    And I braced for impact

  • Distracted and angry

    I'm distracted.

    Why did I let myself become so reliant

    Dependent

    So stupid

    Ugh I'm so mad.

    So mad.

    I let myself become distracted by silly things I could want

    I let myself want them