In Her Shoe There Hides a Knife

Note: This is an excerpt of a play I may or may not write to the fullest. It's just to get a grasp of what the play would look like, so you might see more of it. Or you might not. Enjoy anyway!

(Prince Do bangs open the door of the luxurious palace bedroom and gasps: the princess Zai and a girl he does not know, Indira, are curled on top of the blankets, kissing each other passionately. Within seconds of him stepping into the room, Indira is out of the bed and holding a razor-sharp knife to Prince Do's throat. Prince Do holds up his hands in surrender.)

INDIRA: Who are you and what is your business being in the Princess's room? Answer or this knife is going to get a lot scarier.

PRINCE DO: I-I-the-you...I should be asking who you are, girl holding a literal knife to my throat.

ZAI: (calmly, almost as if she's bored) Indira, put the knife away. You can't kill him, anyway. Unfortunately, he's my lucky betrothed.

(Indira backs away, lowering the knife, and Prince Do steps farther into the room.)

PRINCE DO: (to Indira) Who are you? I haven't seen you around the palace.

INDIRA: That's cause you're never in the court, and I'm usually in the court. I'm the High Judge's respected daughter, and I preside over most of the trials now that my father allows me. He's busy handling the investigation of the murders at the Violet Sun Festival. There was another one just yesterday. Have you heard of those, Prince?

PRINCE DO: Yes, of course I have. I'm not wrapped up in the wedding as much as Zai here. Or at least as much as she should be! You don't even have your dress, do you, Zai?

ZAI: As if. I'm in the palace fitting rooms six hours a day getting pins stuck up my everything. The aunties in charge of the dress are nice, but they're so invested in my opinion of literally the whole dress. Should it be red or blue? Should it be silk or satin? Should it have pearl strings or an opal tiara? I don't care!

INDIRA: Dearest, I would listen to you rant all day, but I've got to go. My father will be expecting me by now.

ZAI: Of course. (they kiss a final time, and Indira runs out of the room. Prince Do moves closer and sits with a thump on the end of the bed.)

PRINCE DO: You know you probably shouldn't be having secret romances with judge's daughters while you're betrothed to somebody. Just saying.

ZAI: (glaring at him) I know. And I'm the princess. I can do whatever I want. So drop it. And...what are you staring at? (Prince Do jerks up from where he was staring at a spot on the floor.)

PRINCE DO: Oh-nothing. Just...why did your girlfriend have a knife in her shoe?

(Zai throws back her head and laughs, then when Prince Do looks very confused, turns back to him, still hiding giggles.)

ZAI: Right. Forgot you're from the South. Well, Prince, I can't believe you haven't figured this out yet, but here in the North, everyone has a weapon. At all times. 

PRINCE DO: Wow. That's...you guys just became a lot scarier. Really? Everyone?

ZAI: Everyone. Test me. Give me some names, I'll tell you the weapon.

PRINCE DO: Okay...um, your maid?

ZAI: Name, please. I'm the princess: I've got a lot of maids.

PRINCE DO: Um, the one who's basically always here in the mornings...Violet?

ZAI: Uh-huh. The pin that she always keeps in her hair? It opens. There's a super-sharp point in there.

PRINCE DO: How about my manservant? I think his name is Li.

ZAI: Two pointed metal bars, one in each perfectly smoothed velvet sleeve.

PRINCE DO: The butler who serves us at supper?

ZAI: Escrima sticks in his tall boots. It's what makes him walk so stiffly.

PRINCE DO: Wow, I thought that was just severe discipline. Okay, now I believe you. Except...what about you?

ZAI: Me?

PRINCE DO: Yeah. What's your weapon? Or do you not have one?

ZAI: (practically growling) Don't test my nerves, Prince. I've got one. (she leans over to her bedside table and snatches the beautiful pink fan covered in lilypad watercolors. Prince Do scoffs.)

PRINCE DO: That? That's your weapon? I could do more with a pebble.

ZAI: It's not really my weapon. (she snaps the fan open expertly, revealing a metal underside with razor-sharp blades on the tip of the fan that can fold down. Prince Do steps backward and gasps.)

ZAI: The Princess of the Northern Kingdoms is delicate, beautiful, and absolutely not to be messed with. I am one of the most dangerous people you will ever meet. If you cross me, I will maim you and leave you to bleed out. Got it?

PRINCE DO: Y-y-yes, yes. Oh, gods. You are the strangest person one could ever wed. 

ZAI: (snapping the fan closed and walking to the door) Good. Now, I'm off to find Indira again. While I'm gone (she looks him up and down with a little smirk), you should probably think about finding a weapon. 

(With that, she runs out of the room, leaving Prince Do with a stunned expression on his face that, as he becomes sure she is gone, slowly turns into a terrifyingly large grin. He slides his hand into his traditional topknot and produces a sharp curved dagger with a tip covered in dried blood.)

PRINCE DO: (to himself) Oh, Princess, I don't think I'll have any trouble at all with finding a weapon. The trouble I've run into is finding a victim.