hope

The air is thick with heat, 

Making me feel as if I’m drowning.

I keep walking, for the fear of going back propels me,

But leaves me thin and sick as I stumble through the streets of what was once my dream. 

The city that claimed to have my fate written out in the stars that shone above,

Ripped out of my desperate grasp, despite all my efforts.

Tears blur my vision. 

There’s no one out at this hour of the night.

The people watch, fearful, from their windows as I hobble past, 

A poor old soul to pity.

I became the kind I hid from when I was just a girl, 

With a plan, 

A lie, 

And a dream, so foreign to me now, that I can’t begin to understand what I was thinking,

When pure devotion took over my heart and mind, setting me free into the world that would eat me alive.