hoping she understands
that poem was a little hasty
i don't even know if she knows
how she feels
about me
hoping she understands
why i blush every time her name is mentioned
why i scribbled those world-heaving words
and handed it to her with a trembling hand
hoping she understands
why
because
my heart
definitely doesn't.
i always feel pressured into
being grateful for the biggest things i can
which to me always sounds like i'm shouting for forgiveness
instead of gratitude. i never get to say i'm grateful
there are all the things I could do with three minutes alone in my room
I have an essay to write and Hebrew to study
I have things to look up and notifications to check
on november first we said
ohgodit'snovemberalreadywheredidallthetimego taking
up all the time in the world with our breath.
on november fifth we said
ohgodpleaseprotectushavemercyonoursins praying
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