life choices, a contemplation

that time 
I ran away from them 
but really 
I was running from me
even though we were eleven 
and playing hide and seek
and they probably weren't going to kiss me
but what if I had stayed
would they have? 


when I chose to tell you 
what i was
just beacuse I had a feeling
and now you ignore me
i wonder if it was that 
or just how anoying I am sometimes

that time
I ate a whole pint of ice cream 
by myself 
in the dark
because I was sad
(you know what ignore that one, I have no regrets.) 

the moment I realized 
just what I was getting myself into 
when I let myself love you

when I compleately spaced
on just how much a little sibling would change my life
and how no, a little bro wont get you more time with mum. 

to be continued later.