My Mask

today 
i am lonely 
sad, 
angry
and something so powerful I almost don't have words for it 
it's almost like a feeling of complete and utter despair 
that underlies every other emotion and feeling
i's suffocating me with negativity 
and even though I smile, 
i laugh,
i look at you like i don' have a care in the world,
inside,
i'm dying, crying, melting away until all that's left is a puddle of unseen tears
because I'm good at lying
i can put on that mask 
of happy, generous, warm, and overall just lovely person
just as easily as I can put on my socks
it's a choice i make every day
and i swear 
everyday i wear that mask
i make someone smile
and i let them
there is a truly nice person inside of me 
it just takes some time to find
and i'm notoriously impatient 
so i stick with my mask 
and hide my true face
because in the end 
it's eisier.