The only reason I am surviving

And I'm here again and I love it

Away from my friends

Away from my peers

My teachers

Here with doable expectations

The stage lights glinting off my glasses like melted candlelight

Laughing and joking with people I respect

A room full of geniuses

It's so refreshing

No more idiotic not-knowing

We are in control here

And I am with people who know this matters

And with every flick of the baton we improve

And suddenly I love it

I love the music

And I look around and we may not talk

We may take this seriously

But we play like magical togetherness is an orchestra

And we are having fun

In a way no one else understands

This is what I want

Can I just do this?

Why must I do everything else?