Shaking

Shaking

Shaking

Shaking.

Will I ever feel anything else?

Crippling fear.

Shaking.

I run to the bathroom.

Tears roll down my cheeks.

My eyes

Are empty.

My heart is, too.

Shaking.

I pinch myself.

Splash my face

With ice cold water.

I'm awake, all right.

Shaking

                 shaking

                                   shaking.

Not a good kind of shaking,

Not the shaking up in front of everyone in the same day,

Not the performing shaking,

Not flute shaking,

Not solo shaking,

Not the good kind.

The scared kind.

Dread.

Shaking.

What happens now?

I can't feel myself.

Can't feel the sadness

The sorrow

The fear.

I don't know why I'm crying.

Well, I know why

I just don't know how I'm crying

Because I can't feel anything.

Shaking.

I will always be

Shaking.