small child


the small child 
who sat in the window 
nobody to play with 
and no new books to get lost in 
who often was lonely 
and shy around new people
who hid when things scared them 
and placed adults and skyscrapers in the same category 
the small child who learned how to dance
and smile as if they didn't care
who wanted to fly like the birds
and then grew up a little
and understood they can't 
who played with toys all day 
and learned how to entertain themselves 
who drew picture after picture 
till their crayons were almost gone 
who did all of this by themselves
all alone 
the medium sized child
who despised nutella (and still does) 
and loved the woods that surrounded them 
who found something like friendship 
and tightly hung on 
only to lose it
like their favorite stuffed animal
who when they thought of the beach
thought of rocky shore lines and milky seaglass
who loved chickadees to a point of mild obsession
who moved yet again 
but back to the place they were born in 
among the pine trees and mountains
the medium sized child
who discovered a place where their strangeness was encouraged 
and creativity brought back to life
the place where they learned to love writing 
and often laughed until it hurt
but still struggled to communicate 
still couldn't quite reach out
who left for a year 
to sandy beaches and bright umbrellas
that never quite made them feel at home 
who missed the subtle scent of forest things
and maple trees instead of palm 
who packed up their things yet again 
and headed back to home
the young teen 
who struggled with the weight of life
wondering why people's expectations were so high
for such a young person to bear 
who went back to that place that made them love writing and art
and found some new people
and ones they knew 
who talked and laughed 
and smiled again 
who grew up some more 
and made a few friends
who still sits by a window 
and wonders what their going to do with their life
they are sitting there now 
taking their time
to craft each phrase and each word
each small subtle rhyme
who will probably write a few more books
and continue the mural on their ceiling 
who might learn how to code stuff 
and do that for a living 
who knows 
i don't 
but i'm sure we'll soon find out. 


 

Inkpaw

VT

18 years old

More by Inkpaw

  • The Boxes In The Corner

    Looming over your shoulders

    Each stack higher than its former

    Every thought and every scrap

    Of an idea too scared to ponder

     

    Every moment that hurt

    Each minute that lingered longer

  • Inadequacy


    How do I push the words out
    From behind my taffy tongue 
    Thick with salty tears 
    And full of grubby thumb 


    I’m a child 
    Pretending that I’m numb 
    To escape the overwhelming feelings 

  • Paper Frogs

    Why

    When feet fall soft but quick 

    Does the hallway extend

    And the hot breath of whoever’s behind me feel hotter 

    Why do I stay pressed to the wall 

    Like a stubborn gruby sticker