Studying on a Wednesday Night

A rush of air into my lungs
lets me know I'm alive again.

it feels like
waking up, 
and
leaving things behind

not quite
metamorphosized,
but now the sun looks different,
I feel the rays hot on my skin
I feel the future in my bones
for the very world
is trembling with hope

it's funny how
I find this moment
wrapped up in 
anxiety,
delivered in a
not-so-pretty package
of junior year butterflies.

it's funny how
my future's changed, how
it suddenly seems
so near

perhaps only I've changed,
and maybe that's what I fear.

I find myself wishing on the stars
that everything will be okay,
but in the corners of my soul,
I know my actions shape each day.

So let them shine.
Let them glitter and remind me
of everything not under the sun,
of how dreams are not so far
from reality--
that line is blurred, really,
until the sunrise chases away the shadows
and forces us to decide.

the eraser shavings are stardust,
my thoughts asteroids as they collide.

The air rushes out,
and I sigh, for I know the sky
will be bright soon,

but for now,
leave me be,
at peace with a world
gently lit by the moon.