Warrior

Feeling lost.

Feeling down.

I have yet to feel the warmth of the sun.

I sit, and I stay, alone, away from everyone.

I feel isolated.

I feel afraid.

My heart is a weight in my chest, and my eyes hang down, trying to close forever.

It gets harder and harder to breathe every day.

I wish… I wish I could go back to simpler times, when the sun did shine, when the rain never came, when I, once, was truly happy.

And now, here I am… in sadness. 

The darkness has destroyed me. I have only a ray of light left, a will to survive.

Yet - I do mask my pain; when my whole spirit feels sick; it hurts, deep agony twisting and pulsing with every moment, thought, or word. 

Even without a word.

I can be silent.

These secrets of my pain have been hidden behind a veil.

Behind this warm smile, these caring eyes, and attitude to outshine the sun, is a hollow void; a shattered heart, meant only for pain, a life in pain.

And I’ve tried… I have tried… tried to move forward and be better, no longer wounded by fear.

Yet - depression, oh -depression, it has made me crumble.

And every time I search for hope, every time it seems as if the clouds above will part, hope is gone; it disappears with a breath.

And I miss my life, before everything was… shattered.

I wish - I wish I were back in simpler times… I wish I could live my life without feeling… gone…

But I… I cannot wish… I can only hope.

But… where is hope? Gone.

Joy? Gone.

Love…? No.

I will always keep my heart; I will always help others, whether or not they help me.

I will not bow down to the dark, the pain, the anger, all that corrupts humanity’s hearts and makes them lost, forever.

I will rise. I will fall.

But I will overcome it.

Because I…

I am a warrior.