We Called It Love

I decided I was in love with you

before I knew what love was.

I had never felt true love.

I mean, I had felt love.

I had loved my family,

the color pink, music.

I had seen love. 
I had watched my parents,

read books, seen the movies.

But I decided I loved you before

I knew the true depth of love.

The word love doesn’t truly mean

anything to a person until they learn

the significance of it.

How truly empty a person can feel without love.

My knees were bruised from kneeling in front

of the kids I wanted to love me.

My eyes were red from crying after I realized

those kids would never choose me.

My throat was raw from screaming out after them

as they went on to the next person in line.

So when I met you, I decided I loved you.

I decided I was in love with you.

Because we were the same.

Desperate for love.

Desperate to be chosen.

So we decided we were in love

before we knew what that meant.

But that caused problems for us.

We didn’t know what we were supposed to feel,

We thought we felt it.

But we tiptoed around the relationship,

too scared to say the wrong thing.

And because of that, we never truly loved each other.

Not in the way we said we did, at least.