numb

tears that stain more than just my pillows
my pride is warped from the moisture of my eyes
and crumbling are the deffenses that once stood so tall
the floor seems a friend waiting to embrace my tired body
as i fall backwards
away from what i so desprately wanted
anger burning like i fire inside of me
but too unstable are my feeble limbs
to suport such a rage
besides. . .how could i ever be mad
at you? 
untill numb i let the dust settle on my face
eyes perpetually open
no steady beat of a heart
to keep me going
it would be so easy. . .
to let everything go
and just slip
into the nothing
that pulls at me every day
dragging one more twentyfour hour peirod away from me
everytime it comes back
with the setting of the sun
a friend i fear 
yet love dearly
soothing are the waves
lapping around my body 
but still numb
i cant feel the air 
as it parts with my body
and i sink downwards
i have no clue
of whats to come
for i never felt a thing
as death wrapped their sweet fingers around my neck
and showed no mercy.