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Jan 08
poem 6 comments
Anna P.

When Tears Were Left Untraced

mediaRecorder_5a6f8675424ab.ogg.mp3
Day 1 of 7:

They were listening through the cracks in the wall,
I could hear them whispering,
Giggling at the snorts from my nose.

Such a cry baby.
She'll never know we're here.
Completely oblivious to everything.


I wonder if they knew,
I was crying over them.

Day 2 of 7:

I always cry discreetly after Spanish,
It's a given.
They knew that.

The course isn't even that hard.
She just wants attention.
She must have been raised by storm clouds or something.


I wonder if they knew,
Their glares from the other end of the room cause my pain.

Day 3 of 7:

A 1 out of 4 sprawled across my paper,
Something I've never seen before,
Even on my worst days.

She's so stupid.
She probably deserves that grade.
Ha! Her face is turning red.


I wonder if they knew,
That they were speaking out loud.

Day 4 of 7:

I've never been a good public speaker,
My voice always quivers with tears,
And my eyes have the faint feel of darkness.

That was awful.
The literal worst.
A mute could do better than she could!


I wonder if they knew,
I was scared of what they would think of me.

Day 5 of 7:

I thought I had gotten away from them this time,
Sitting in the far corner of the math room,
Right up front where I felt safe.

She's trying to impress the teacher.
Everyone knows she doesn't have friends.
Like, she doesn't have to flaunt it.


I wonder if they knew,
I have feelings that were hurting too.

Day 6 of 7:

Not even in my own bed,
Did I feel safe from harm,
So I always had a light on.

Scaredy-cat much?
Look, it even has wittle fwishies.
Aw, just the cutest piece of garbage.


I wonder if they knew,
That they were even in my nightmares.

Day 7 of 7:

I finally found a way,
To run and hide from their lies,
Leaving my trails of tears untraced.

She's not here 'cause she's scared of us.
Probably faking a sick day or something.
Who needs her, anyway?


I wonder if they knew,
That the scars on my heart were never going to heal.

And they still haven't.

 
Audio download:
mediaRecorder_5a6f8675424ab.ogg.mp3
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Discussion

Comments

  1. Hazel.C.
    Jan 09, 2018

    This format helps put into perspective how much impact people can have on others, and in a short time, the days emphasizing the escalation of emotional instability.

    I love the title, it’s one of those that not only grabs the reader’s attention, but takes on new meaning after reading the piece. The use of “untraced”, especially, creates this; At first, I thought it meant “the tears uncried”, but after reading, the meaning (for me) changed to something like “the tears whose source was never searched for”.

    My only suggestion is about the last section (Day 7): I think it would strengthen the impact of this last part to clarify: what type of pain did the escape entail? The ideas, details and descriptions on the other six are strong, and the ideas behind this last one have an impact, but I think the reader needs more specification to connect with this idea and experience.

    If this was based off an experience of yours, I’m truly sorry you had to deal with this. It’s amazing to turn a negative experience into something others can learn and relate to, and hopefully a release of the experience
    Thank you for sharing this, It’s a strong warning against unnecessary (and any) cruelty, and it’s negative impacts, and a reminder that emotions often have causes, though they aren’t always visible, and aren’t weaknesses..

    ~Hazel

    ~Hazel

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  1. Anna P.
    Jan 09, 2018

    Thank you so much! I changed the ending; I think it's more fitting now. As for the experience, a good chunk of this is, indeed, real, while some parts I added just to push the emphases on the hurt and weakness that one feels when going through something like this. Again, thank you.

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  1. gg
    Jan 09, 2018

    Hazel C has, as is her practice, given you an eloquent response. It is hard to add much. I get her point about Day 7 -- and I agree. The last lines in a piece are as important as the first two. My take on it is that I KNOW that they don't know the pain they've caused. I think the last two lines would be better used to express relief...

    This is a strong and powerful piece Anna. I am so appreciative that you shared it. And, like Hazel, my heart goes out to you if this is, in fact, something real.

    gg

    I founded YWP.
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  1. Anna P.
    Jan 09, 2018

    Thank you so much. Thanks for the advice too. I've never really thought about the ending being as important as the start. I believe I have made it better. Again, thank you!

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  1. Gracie
    Feb 07, 2018

    This poem is so vivid! I love it. I can almost feel this girl's sadness.

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  1. Anna P.
    Feb 07, 2018

    Thank you : )

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