Who am I?

Sometimes I think

Of what my life would be without this

Without the conductor who changed my life

Without my duet partner who taught me how to perform

Without my instrument

Without the music

Without the song in my chest

The song that's trapped

But I will be able to free it

By playing everyone else's stories

And discovering my own

In time

When it comes to this,

I can have patience.

Who am I,

Without this?

Who am I without all this?

I wonder.

I wonder what makes me me

If I don't have this.

If I lived in a world without it.

And then I realize what everyone else is saying,

Not knowing who they are

Who they want to be

What they want to do with their life

Not knowing is scary

But I haven't not known,

Haven't ever had to panic,

Not really,

Because by the time I was old enough to

I had found myself

Latched onto it so securely

Because it's who I am.

And I know that,

In every part of me.

I can feel it.

But sometimes still

I ask myself

Who am I?

Who am I without this?

I would be lonely and broken

I would be

Not

Me

Not

This girl

I would be

Haven't found myself yet

Faceless

Nameless

I would be invisible

Because the one thing that shines light

Onto every edge of my person

Every smile, every fight

Every love and every loss

The one validation

That's me.

Who am I?

Who would I be

If I didn't have this?

QueenBee

VT

13 years old

More by QueenBee

  • Life

    "Life isn't about finding yourself.

    Life is about creating yourself."

    Said the big chalkboard on the wall

    In that gym lined with red mats

    And chairs and chairs and chairs

    I'll never forget

  • Busywork

    I feel useless

    Unproductive

    No one needs me right now

    Good

    I have nothing to do

    B o r e d o m.

    I can't stop thinking about you

    I assign myself tasks

    Keeping me occupied

  • It all comes back

    When I got home

    After those two days

    Passed by much too fast

    And then they were gone

    And I was changed forever

    When I got home

    I remember

    I cried and cried and cried

    From longing