Helpless

I saw a photo

Of you when you still had hair

Brown, nothing

Special, that hair was.

I forgot what you looked like

With hair that didn’t come off when you traded it

For a hat.

What if I forget what you looked like

At all

Someday?

And hugs last longer now

And sometimes all we do

Is sleep on the couch

You’re tired and sick

I hate

How your head felt tucked into me

Like a baby’s

No hair no fat

I hate

How strong I know you are

It makes the illusion of weak

Hurt even more

It’s not all an illusion.

I want your hair back

I want to plan crazy bike rides

And not worry about you

But until then I will

And I might be worrying

For a while.