IDK RN pt. 3

Chapter two ~ Leo

Ivanna walks out and I swear my heart skips a beat or five, then makes up for it by beating over time. 

Wine-red dress. Braided hair. Ivanna. Somehow she looks both elegant and completely her chaotic self at the same time. I’m staring—probably way too openly—and I don’t care. I try not to hold my breath. Damn she is beautiful. She walks over to me and I can’t not notice the slight sway in her hips, or the way her ears go a little pink as she sees me. She has her head tilted down slightly as she looks at the ground. She stops a few feet in front of me, still staring at the floor like it personally owes her money.

“Iv… you look—” I choke on my own words like a loser. Great start, Leo. Amazing. Gold medal in social failure.

I will try again. “You look really pretty.”

“Oh… Do you mean it?” She asks, looking slightly up.

And now I’m the one staring at the ground. Nice role reversal.

I clear my throat. “Ready to go?”

She nods, but she’s… fidgeting? With her sleeve? With her hair? With oxygen itself? 

I grab her coat off of the hook, and hold it for her, because I guess today I have decided to be chivalrous. Or maybe whipped. Or something like that.

She slips into the coat and whispers, “Thank you,” like it’s some big deal. I mean, was it to her? Or was she embarrassed?

We head out of the apartment and take the elevator down. She’s standing kinda close — not like “oops sorry” close but like “if I move my arm I’ll brush yours” close. My heart does that annoying thing where it’s like: HELLO??? EMOTION???

The elevator dings, and we step into the lobby, Everyone except Mara, and Verena were down there. 

Evan’s leaning against a marble column dramatically like he’s auditioning for a soap opera.

Ria and Emily are taking selfies with the giant potted plant like it’s a C-list celebrity.

Lyra’s sitting on a couch sipping an iced drink she definitely did NOT have when she left, watching the whole thing like she’s omnipotent. There was a guy next to her, who I figured was her boyfriend, Mark. Then a guy next to him, Ivanna, mentioned his name was something like Max. Ivanna went up to him and gave him a hug. He hugged her back. BACK. Great. A guy who’s not me is getting hugs from Ivanna. I wasn’t her boyfriend, but…

Mark gives me a nod -The ‘Bro I know everything’ nod to be exact. 

I grimace back at him, he seems to get me. 

Ivanna walks over to me and grabs my hand. HAND not wrist, my brain short circuits. Her hand is warm and fits perfectly with mine. And I—

“You’re Leo right?” says I-think-is-named-Max.

“Uh, yeah. Um I—Leo.”

Mara walks into the room talking to Verena and is giving me a look like: zesty much?

Ivanna pulls me forward, “MARKUS ANDREW SMITH.” Mark looks over and rolls his walks over.

“Yes, chaos gremlin?” he says, patting her on the head. THAT'S MY THING. Well, not technically mine, but still, MY thing.

Ivanna swats his hand away. “Rude. Anyway—this is Leo. Leo, this is Mark. Lyra’s boyfriend. And professional instigator.”

“Ohhhh, your the reason Iva-”

“MARKUS.” She grips my hand harder, almost like she’s trying to kill it.

“Relax. I was going to say why you own…”He looks like he’s trying to think. “Four waffle makers.”

Ouch. but yet, it sounds very accurate.

I let out a breath I didn’t realize I was holding. “Uh. Hi. Nice to meet you.”

Mara shoots me another look: See. You. Are. Zestyyyyyyyyy.

“OKAY!” Evan says emerging from his corner “Lets leave before I pass out in an aesthetic way, mostly because Ria and Emily say I need to be more ‘Aesthetic’.”

 *             *              *

Verena walked out the lobby doors, the ones she had walked in not ten minutes ago. She had been thinking so much about NYC, and seeing Ivanna. For a while she didn’t realize her own feelings. In 8th, she had found out that Evan had liked her at the end of last year. And she still had feelings for him now. And a little bit all through her and Mara’s relationship, Ivanna had been her comfort person. 

She spotted Ivanna laughing with Leo on the sidewalk (who was talking to a leaf in a Shakespearean way), and a pang of something—jealousy? No. Nostalgia? Probably.—hit her chest. Ivanna’s presence had always been comforting, grounding, even when Verena didn’t realize it at the time. She had never really understood Ivanna–or herself really–and her affect on people. They could be in the worst mood, and she (or herself) could make them light up.

She gets a little nudge by Evan, God damn it. “Well, you brought a dress?” He says surprised. 

“I mean, you brought a suit.” She says looking him up and down.

“What do we think of those two?” he says, gesturing to Ivanna and Leo. Ignoring her comment.

“Totally like each other but won’t admit it.” He nodded in agreement.

 *             *              *

We made it to Ivanna, Lyra, Max, and Mark’s school. It was way bigger than any school I had been to, except the college tours I had been on (obviously). Ivanna climbed up the stairs and sat on the stone wall at the top.

“Are y’all coming or just bask in its beauty?” she laughed. I gazed up at her. Max ran up the stairs and Ivanna climbed up on his back. “ONWARD!” I ran up the stairs with Evan by my side.

“You like her.” He said. How does he know everything?

“Maybe I do, maybe I don’t.” I try to hide my face.

Evan snorts. “That wasn’t an answer.”

I scoff, and shove my hands in my pockets. I’m trying (and failing) to pretend my face isn’t currently on fire. “You don’t know anything” I roll my eyes.

“Oh, I know everything,” he says smugly. “You’ve had that same look since fifth grade. The one where you pretend you’re chill but you’re actually spiraling.”

“You’re insufferable”

“But yet, it’s accurate.”

At the top of the stairs, Ivanna is still on Max’s back like she’s conquering a small nation. “THIS CAMPUS IS MINE NOW,” she declares, arms raised dramatically. 

Lyra slowly claps, “Congrats dictator Ivanna.”

Ivanna hops down from Max’s back, landing a little too close to me for my mental stability. She grins, completely unbothered, like she didn’t just ruin my ability to form coherent thoughts.

She takes a step back and trips, I grab her elbow, catching her before she tumbled down the stairs. She looked into my eyes.

“Oh, um,” She moved her elbow away from me and turned. “We better get going inside…”

“Oh, umm… yeah.” I shrug it off. It's okay… right?

She walked off following Max, well not following, more like walking next to. That's when I decided that he was my mortal enemy. Evan stood up next to me. 

“That wasn’t too smooth.”

“Shut up”

“Why should I”

I paused. “Because you're right, I do like her. I memorized a poem from one of her favorite movies. Am I okay? No, I’m not because she’s not mine.”

“That’s deep.” He sighed. “Let’s go enjoy this party brother.”

I took a step inside, there were a ton of people, lights, and drinking, not like lemonade, some kid had a bottle of beer. I repeat BEER. 

The bottle catches the light and my brain immediately goes: nope. Like—sir??? We are minors??? This is not Coachella???

Evan notices, “Come on. Let’s go find everyone and relax. It’s probably is his older brothers…. Or sisters.”

“That doesn’t make that any better.” I say glaring at the kid. Evan just rolls his eyes and drags me to the nearest bathroom. The door slams behind us.

“Look at me.” He says. I try to avoid direct eye contact. “I said LOOK. AT. ME.” I look him in the eyes.

“What. We shouldn’t be here.” I say looking a little past him. “There’s probably a kid vaping in the other bathroom.” Which was believable. If kids at our school do, probably at this school.

Evan squints at me. “Okay first of all—accurate. Second of all—you’re not actually upset about the vape.”

“How do you  know?”

“You’ve been looking at Ivanna all day.”

I sorta short-circuited. Yeah, I probably have. “No I haven’t.”

He stares me down. “And I’m not talking right now.”

“Maybe a little…” 

Evan did the little air quotes and rolled his eyes. “A little.” 

“She and Max are probably dating. I mean have you seen them?” I say, gesturing to the door. “Can we just leave the bathroom?”

“Fine. But you better smile.” Evan says, opening the door. I roll my eyes.

I walk out onto the dance floor, Ivanna is dancing with Max, Lyra, Mark, our our group of friends. Ivanna waves us over, as Max spins her.

“Where have you guys been? I went outside and couldn’t find you!” she says pulling my wrist (this time) onto the dancefloor. 

“Just talking about how some kid had a pack of beer.” Evan says. She rolls her eyes.

“I’m gonna guess, a ginger, wearing jeans, and a white t-shirt and leather jacket?” 

“Yeah… how’d you know?” I say raising an eyebrow.

“His name is Ryder Smith. He’s quite an ass.”

As soon as Ivanna said that, The guy named Ryder came over and started hitting on Lyra. Why he was, was beyond me. Ivanna walked over, yelled something a couldn’t here then kicked him in the balls. It was like the whole party paused. People gasped and stared at her. Ivanna walked out like she owned the place. Damn. I walked out after Ivanna, she was sitting on the stone wall with her heels next to her. She must’ve seen me because she patted the stone next to her, signaling me to sit. So I did.

“Iv, are you and Max dating?” I say to her. She looked puzzled.

“God no. He was the person I first befriended at this school.” 

“I thought Lyra was.”

“She was the second.”

“Oh.”

“Most people would assume that until Max and I walk in. A lot of people ask if we are. Sometimes we make fun of then and jokingly say yes… Kinda like us back in middle school.”

I knew people asked Ivanna if she liked me in middle school. I knew they asked her if we were dating. I never felt weird until now. 

“Well, you wanna go dance? And I mean the one you still owe me.” I said, looking into her green eyes. She looked at me confused. “You promised me in 7th grade, at our ‘spring fling’ you would dance with me. But you never did.”

“And that would be, because I was nervous.” Ivanna looked at the starry sky, in the distance we could see all of the city lights. “And I was nervous because you were the guy I

Were? I was the guy she USED to. Does that mean not anymore? 

“Let’s go then.”