Winding down

As the school year winds down,

So do I -

And yet

The homework

Does not.

We are saying goodbye

To beloved interns -

Beloved teachers -

If only for the summer -

Beloved friends, possibly forever

But I hope not -

And the work

Persists.

Due

Due 

Due.

Deadlines.

Responsibility.

Hasn't been a problem

Until these last few weeks.

And I am so tied up

Emotionally

I can't find it in me

To work hard on the little things -

Tests, assessments

Quizzes, posters

Essays, projects.

I want to focus

On the social aspect.

I love our teachers

But not what they're doing to us right now.

I am finding it

Harder to keep up

Than ever.

I am 

Drowning

As the year winds down

And so does my mental state.

I want to prioritize

The things I won't have

Next year

Ugh

And so I can't focus

On anything else

And I am

Hopelessly

Distracted.

I will be -

I always will be - 

I always have been -

Each year

As the year

Begins to fade into summer.

I am always

Like this.

I

Stop caring about

The assignments and more about

My friends

Even more so this year because

I won't get to see them next year

At all.

Is that understandable?

That now I am asking for

Extensions on projects

And so stressed out

It's hard to function?

Is it okay

That I don't want to live in work mode right now

Because I can't find it in me

To care about

Anything other than the precious few days

I have left with my people?

With the group

I've built

From the rubble?

As the year winds down,

I find myself

Completely

Utterly

Lost.