You

I remember the day I met you,
sunlight beaming on your face.
You told me you would love, Then how much I was a disgrace

I remember the day your friend called,
I heard you on the phone,
As he told me how you missed me,
Next moment you were gone.

Everyone said it was an accident,
But I know that's a lie,
Because I was there when it happened,
When I couldn't save you,
You died.

I remember the hospital,
Everything so pristine and white,
But it couldn't hide the red marks,
And the dreams that haunt me at night.

I remember the confusion
Why you would do that to yourself,
It was a manipulative move,
I wish I had known how to help.

Everyone says no one will kill themselves,
When they threaten their own,
In a way it's manipulation,
How I wish they had been wrong.


I can never forgive myself,
But I couldn't take you back,
And your broke apart my heart,
You killed yourself in front of me,
How could you take it to that.


I remember how your friend cried
, And the pain got me too,
Because I can never forget it,
But I can't forgive you.

I'm at war with myself constantly,
My pain feels so new,
Your anniversary is coming up,
But I don't want that,
I want you.

Though we'll never marry,
Like the silly plans we had
 I've found someone who loves me,
I hope you would be glad.

A part of me still beats for you,
But im trying to move on,
Because forgetting you isn't easy,
I just need to be strong.