Mar 20
Ink Sparks's picture

What There Is To Lose

"There was another school shooting today."
​I looked out the window, a silent scream echoing in my head.
"Where?"
"Maryland."
​I closed my eyes to keep the panic inside.
This plauge of hurting started far away from my home town
​but now it's creeping silently up the coast
​and taking the lives of children in their own schools
slithering like a sadistic snake
​with a fetish for fear.
It is now that I realize, with a sinking feeling
​like acid dripping out of my pores
​that I have too much to lose
​if the snake bites.
I could lose my best friends
​all the funny moments we share
walking to classes
​laughing so hard we cry
our inside jokes and shared dreams.
One bullet
and they're gone.
​The thought nearly kills me.
​I could lose my family
my brother far away in his highschool
​could fall dead
​in the hallways he once walked, carefree.
​The thought keeps me awake at night.
​Just as terrifying, however
​is the fact that I could lose myself.
​My short hair and green eyes
​the freckle on my ring finger
​and the dimple I get over my eyebrow when I'm thinking
​my whole future ripped from the hands of time
and...
silence.
​No more writing
​or drawing
or running
​or laughing with friends
​or singing in chorus
or taking science tests
​or going to dances
​or....
​or getting to tell that special person I love them.
​No more chances.
​To take someone's life
​is to take a thousand possibilities
​from the world around.
​That thought makes me terrified.
Because if I had to make a split second choice
I know I would choose to have my life taken over others
​and I am far from ready to die.
​Maybe if we pinch ourselves, we can make this nightmare go away.