I cut through my spiraling, twisting, coalescing thoughts by turning my attention to my phone.
I press the small button to wake it up.
I look at the time.
8:26.
I turn again, this time away from my phone, and the thoughts come back.
Foggy, confused, uncontrollable.
I think about every action I took today
And how I could have done things differently
Said things in other ways
Left people alone for certain amounts of times.
It feels like I could think about every single thing I did for hours and hours and get no answers,
No conclusions.
I’d have to do something else.
I fumble around with small objects
I tidy the space around me
I shift a glass just a little to the right
I glance at my phone.
I hit the small button, and the phone lights up.
I see the time.
8:26.
Huh.
I pick up my phone and text the person I need answers from.
These are the actions I need to make.
I put down my phone.
I feel a sense of dread.
They answer me.
Relieved by their answer, I look at the time once more,
8:28.
I press the small button to wake it up.
I look at the time.
8:26.
I turn again, this time away from my phone, and the thoughts come back.
Foggy, confused, uncontrollable.
I think about every action I took today
And how I could have done things differently
Said things in other ways
Left people alone for certain amounts of times.
It feels like I could think about every single thing I did for hours and hours and get no answers,
No conclusions.
I’d have to do something else.
I fumble around with small objects
I tidy the space around me
I shift a glass just a little to the right
I glance at my phone.
I hit the small button, and the phone lights up.
I see the time.
8:26.
Huh.
I pick up my phone and text the person I need answers from.
These are the actions I need to make.
I put down my phone.
I feel a sense of dread.
They answer me.
Relieved by their answer, I look at the time once more,
8:28.
- Moxie Zealla's blog
- Sprout
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