we were watching a movie,
hand in hand
my head on her shoulder
sure, we're platonic
but we both want girlfriends
why not each other
god, I dont want to fuck this up though
loose a friend, for what?
a kiss and everything about her?
she isnt what i thought
i would be into
yet here i am
imagining our lips, moulding
so close i can almost feel her
the skin of her lips on mine
but she doesnt like me like that
and i dont know how i feel
so i guess we'll just cuddle and
call it like it is
hand in hand
my head on her shoulder
sure, we're platonic
but we both want girlfriends
why not each other
god, I dont want to fuck this up though
loose a friend, for what?
a kiss and everything about her?
she isnt what i thought
i would be into
yet here i am
imagining our lips, moulding
so close i can almost feel her
the skin of her lips on mine
but she doesnt like me like that
and i dont know how i feel
so i guess we'll just cuddle and
call it like it is
- PDXmarvel's blog
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Quella
Dec 18, 2018
Hi PDXmarvel,
This is Quella, one of the YWP mentors. I love this piece! The way you divided up the stanzas works so well with the flow of the poem and feels really authentic, almost like a stream of consciousness.
I also love the last line (and corresponding title). It sort of leaves the reader guessing a little... It made me wonder, would "calling it like it is" be calling it just a friendship, or calling it something more because that's the way YOU might feel? Maybe you intended it to be one way or the other, but I really like how it could go either way. Most of the rest of the poem feels pretty concrete and straightforward, so having that little twist of uncertainty adds a really nice contrast. Well done!
Be well, be bright.
Olivia