Suffocation

I fell

The ground didn't catch me, though

and I'm still falling

suffocating in my own sadness and grief

in shared sadness and grief, actually

except that it hit you harder

because you were closer to her

because you knew her more

but I still have the drowning sensation

I still can't go ten seconds without crying

and I fell

and the ground didn't catch me

and I don't want to get up

to brush this off like it's nothing

when it very much isn't nothing

but I also don't want to stay in this feeling of mourning

and I don't want to carry on

I am suffocating

but for a valid reason.