Jan 14

For Pan

*Play the audio as you read*

Oh Greek god of wild things
plants and beasts and birds with wings
He who loves the dirt and leaves
He who does protect the trees,
Your smile is a gental breeze
Your fierceness is with sand and weeds
 How do you feel we've treated you?
 your territory nature true.
  We've demolished many parts of it,
 hurt the animals, made them sick
 stupidly messed up the eco systems
  but with one word we'll help you fix them.
 I know your frustration; we are too,
 Nature is our priority too,
But please keep singing you song so clear,
To remind us why we need you here.
Audio download:
For Pan.m4a
Jan 08

Empty Heart/Broken Soul

Jan 06

-SONG- Words for an Empty Street (How You Left it to Be)

   how you left it to be.m4a

   I haven't posted a song in a while! I have so many that I'm going to try and record, but this one I wanted to record and post as soon as possible; I'm kind of proud of it, even though at the same time I dislike it -the self-inflicted curse of songwriting. It's supposed to be the theme of a short movie I'm working on, but that's not even close to being done yet, so for now, here's the song! (Constructive criticism much appreciated!) 

Walk to a place
Down in the rain
Drowning in plain old everyday
Pockets and a tired face
Just go along
Ignoring that empty space

Places, things
I can't recall
Done with it all, in a way
Breathing through the empty days
Just go along
Dig deeper a hiding space

'Cause things have a way
Of falling into place


I was supposed to be peeling potatoes, and this happened. I was using a kitchen knife.
 I don’t know for the life of me why it displays the pictures upside-down.
Nov 09
audio 2 comments challenge: Hazel

barnaby's house

another song from my experimentation with the kind of stuff i want for the hazel's house soundtrack. this one is less terrifying--it coincides with the initial drive through hulcastle and the kids' first view of goddard manor so there's a little snippet of a theme that will become hazel's in there. i actually did this one with a metronome so it sounds like maybe it has a tempo! 
Audio download:
Barnaby's House.m4a
Oct 26
audio 4 comments challenge: Hazel

would anyone like an auditory nightmare?

so i know it's been a while since i posted music on here (the computer i had logic on crashed and it took me forever to reinstall plus i've been super busy) and here i am with something that's... not so much music as a collection of the most hair-raising synth sounds i could find in the sound library? see, i've been experimenting with the kinds of sound and music i'm gonna want for various scenes in hazel's house because that gives some direction to my endeavours and this one goes to the second seance scene, the one with hazel. if you want to get a little shot of adrenaline, or are feeling a little low on horrendous screeching noises then maybe this'll be fun. or terrifying. 

for maximum atrocity, listen through headphones
Sep 25

Just some strangeness...

Found a cool setting on my keyboard and had a mini-jam session. Enjoy...
Sep 07

Where I'm From

Wrote this about a year ago and just rediscovered it.

   Where I’m from
   I’m no one
    Just taking up space under the dying sun where I’m from
   Where I’m from
   You buy your fun
   I can’t forget the things I’ve done where I‘m from 
Every time I woke up I was a little surprised
And I wondered why I kept myself alive
And god knows this place was ready to die
But it was all I’d ever known
And I only ever meant to pass you by
But your home looks so pretty from up in the sky
It’s been a long way and I’m fixing to die
I should’ve thought of that before I left home
But when you looked at me with that empty, burning stare
And you looked right on through my eyes as if I wasn’t there
You took me right on back to the place where I was before
With the stagnant, dirty air
Full of faces I can’t recall anymore
You know I’m not unused to being alone
Audio download:
Where I'm From.mp3
Aug 28


  He wears a crown upon his head
He holds a weapon in his hand
He drags his fingers through the sand
  He holds his poison in his teeth
He knows he hardly has to think
He breathes in sound and spits up ink
And he is blinded by his own light
And he knows no one taught him to fight
Oh, Anthony, talk to me
Oh, Anthony
Just breathe,    breathe
  He throws his ring onto the ground
She throws him out and makes him run
He reaches for his only son
 His lyrics fall on soundless ears
He holds a pocketful of pills
He knows the chaser is what kills
But he knows someone stands behind the lens
And he knows she’ll be there when the vision ends
Oh, Anthony, talk to me
Oh, Anthony
Just breathe,    breathe
  He knows he’ll die the way he lived
He’s so afraid he doesn’t care
He reaches for the empty air
  He keeps it all inside his head
Audio download:
Aug 09

One Thousand Days and Counting


(1st verse)
White noise, check your conscience here
 She said in space there's no room for fear
She kept a picture by the door
 To remind her of the way things were before

(2nd verse)
"Houston, I'm never coming down
I'd rather watch the world keep turning 'round
Up here it's just my rocketship and me
And you can't cry in zero gravity
 She knows there's nothing for her there
As she sits up there breathing prepackaged air
She hates the feel of solid ground
Up here she's a queen without a crown

Who the hell do you think you are?
Caught between Planet Earth and the local star
You better love it up there, sitting all alone
You're one thousand days and counting and you're still not coming home

Just a sailor without a sea
A starspun curiosity
I've lost control
(3rd verse)
Jul 29

Green Light

Hope you enjoy!
(Also keep in mind that this one is a little difficult for me to play on guitar and I didn't practice it much before recording)


(1st verse)
I left the green light on last night
Then stayed awake and wrote your name
I left it well within your sight
So you might come like moth to flame
Come to burn
If I should speak
What would you learn?

Thoughts they rise and fall and fade away
Someday I'll be gone and you might wonder why you stayed

(2nd verse)
All that lies between our minds
Are years of which you're unaware
In the dark you cannot find them
So I sigh and keep you there
You cannot know
For if you knew
You might let go

Thoughts they rise and fall and fade away
Someday I'll be gone and you might wonder why you stayed

(3rd verse)
My time is waiting in the wings
Jul 20

Pale and Shapely Bone

(1st verse) 
Let me feel you lift me to our closest star
  Let me steal you like the precious thing you are
  Stony gazes make my colorless skin crawl
  Passing through phases, our only hope is to evolve

(2nd verse)
  We put our hopes and dreams on a rocket ship to Mars
  It’s closer than it seems, the future’s not so far
 You’re watching Venus rise, I’ve never felt so low
  No though escapes the mind, no light escapes the soul

 All I want is to burn through your black hole eyes
Pray don’t close your eyes, look to the sky and I’ll show you your first blue sunrise

(3rd verse)
 Come off the ceiling, you know you’re making me feel low
  Home’s just a feeling, and it’s one I cannot know
  Ten thousand liar’s words have left me on my own
  Build me a pyre of pale and shapely bone

 All I want is to burn through your black hole eyes
Audio download:
Pale and Shapely Bone.mp3
May 21

Jail Writing

The glow of the lamplight illuminated her face
As she worked diligently on her essay.
Not small minded
But small
She scratched away with her pencil 
Leaving traces
On the paper.
Her face lit up with excitement.
The girl put down her lined piece of paper,
That looked like a jail for words.
She took out
A piece of blank paper
And began to write.
"The glow of the lamplight illuminated her face..." 
May 13

Alacrity - Spoken Word

Here is another video I created using WeVideo!
Written, read, created, and mostly filmed by me
Song: "You're Somebody Else" Instrumental by Flora Cash 

There is sunshine this morning. 
It warps the frost on the window,
melts frozen feathers into my palm, 
dampens the folded cuff of my coat. 
I'm not waiting for anyone. 

This morning there is music resonating
down the hallway at school. 
Someone stands in the center of a room to my right,
mouth open,
dancing with words,
smiling only half as wide as me. 

There's ink on my wrist,
blued from writing late into the night 
when my bare feet refused to walk
in the solitary dark to the cold sink down the hall, 
wash my hands
with frothy soap under endless water. 
May 10


Make myself a new messiah,
"Trust me," I say- they know I'm a liar;
some good old-fashioned bloodletting,
you take it back- I'm not forgetting
that time they told me I was dirty-
Little birdie,
far too wordy,
                      quite upsetting.
It wasn't long before it worsened,
hateful, pithy little person-
can't explain why my shows are all booked;
you say they're mad- I say they're hooked
and maybe just a little crazy-
Slightly lazy,
eyes are hazy
                      since I first looked.
Burn this copy; new revision-
tripping on my tunnel vision;
dark and gritty, avant-garde,
cannot swallow- much too hard
if you've ever stopped to listen-
Twisted vixen,
pavement glistens
                              with glass shards.
The shades are drawn; the light is darkened
Audio download:
May 06

Trashcan Man

It was a matter of fact
Something Trashy didn't have 
All he had was a matter of time 
That was running out
Always something of flame
We knew Trashy was to blame 
I guess we never really understood
What he was about 

But his name
Became a game
I remember how we would shout

Come to get rid of the mess of the human race?
Soon you're gonna burn away the town
Are you gonna burn the whole damn world down?"
Young Trashy, Trashy was our clown

"Hey, Trashman
Don't you think it's best you burned off your face?
'Cause we're sick and tired of looking at you cry"
And to this day, I wonder why we felt so big 
When we saw our words leaking out of Trashy's eyes 

It was a matter of love
Something Trashy didn't know
Have I told you all the words we would call him? 
He was a matter of flame
Always hating at the rain 
Audio download:
Trashcan Man.m4a
Apr 08

I Will Stick Out

They put me in a system that my people can’t escape
Just because my people don’t blend in, just because of their skin
They say “ make America great again”
It’s tough because they can’t see it through a black lens
They give us commercials to wear the latest trends
When they wear it it’s lit, but when we wear it it’s ghetto
But when a black person gets shot they lay low
They don’t want to think that a person that looks like them would do that
So they lie to everyone and say that we were strapped
They ask us questions about the shooting that are irrelevant
To make us look like the bad guy, well, that’s how the message is sent
Poor white guys are too ignorant to see the apparent
They’re put in a system, too, just with a lighter sentence
So I got a question, why is February the only time I learn about my heredity
While we lie to kids and teach them about good white guys like Santa and the tooth fairy
Apr 04

I Remember

I remember a time when I thought the world was a beautiful place.

I remember thinking about villains in stories and movies and laughing because everyone nowadays is so nice. How could anybody be that cruel? It didn’t make sense.

I remember history lessons, and the way we learned about war, discrimination, hatred. It seemed so far away, as if they were fairy tales told to scare us. The deaths, the victims, all of that was just numbers to us. An annoyance to fit so many zeros onto that one line we set aside for statistics.

I remember watching the news with my father half-heartedly. I didn’t understand what the person on the screen was talking about, and I didn’t really want to. I just wanted the person to stop talking about whatever he was going on about so we could switch back to Disney Channel.
Audio download:
I Remember.m4a