C-L-S

There is a different version of me that leaks out,

dripping ink on these pages,

hollow and raw,

saying all my thoughts.

A flow of words that may have never left my head,

We need more joy in this world, 

we need less of this depressing sense of life, 

when everything around us is so beautiful. 

But we only look through a gray lens to see it. 

I'm looking in the mirror,

I don't match the picture on the screen,

should I be sad or pleased?

One click at a time,

one more scroll,

oops I fell down the rabbit hole.

The distance you put between us is beyond seen,

can't believe the length I've went just to get you to want me.

Now all you do is haunt my dreams,

making my thoughts slowly bleed,

I crave physical touch,

I need to feel skin to skin,

I need to be felt,

I crave something I hate.

I've never liked hugs or the feeling of someone touching me,

I am saying good bye to you,

my dear reader,

Because I know after I look back over my shoulder you will be gone,

onto the next page,

maybe even the next book,