Inkpaw

the light fades
the darkness spreading across my palm 
engulfing my outstreched arm 
the shadows rise 
and down I fall
my body curling
and aching
into a scared little ball
the fingers 
of my hands

nobody knows
except that one friend
nobody sees
how it hurts me sometimes
when all I can see 
is your hand in mine
but you don't see that 
and it's just me and ghost 
a thought and a wish 

the darkness slowly lifting 
as the snow falls
my sanity slowly drifting
far from where I am 
but I don't mind
it's still a nice sight
to watch the world awaken at my fingertips

as I sit here
drowning myself in other people's worlds 
and their words
my eyes lazily ambling down my screen 
bringing information about life 
outside my prison cell of a mind
to my brain 

as an older sibling 
I wield a certain type of magic
with a wand made of memories
and a broom formed from love
I zip around 
wiping honey off hands
and sewing up stuft animals 
I do all I can 

This was it, this was the day, I would end it all. No more fake parents, looking to play pretend with me, like I'm some sort of toy. No more pitying sad smiles, and overly concerned, too nice teachers. No more feeling like an outcast.