Inkpaw

I look at you daring you to do what we both know we shouldn't.
I do it too.
We both gag,
and wonder how on earth someone could actualy like this stuff,
you look up at me, a smile starting to creep across your soft lips

today 
i am lonely 
sad, 
angry
and something so powerful I almost don't have words for it 
it's almost like a feeling of complete and utter despair 
that underlies every other emotion and feeling

the feeling I get when you look at me is alomost indiscribable 
it makes me feel like I'm the only person left on earth 
like the world would be happy 
just to sit by
and watch you watch me 

I said something I regret,
and now you won't meet my eyes
you won't look to see me smile 
when someone else makes me laugh 
and so I retreat into my mind
to think 
of how to say sorry 

I hear my own breath 
rising and falling with my chest
creating tiny white clouds in the chilly night air 
I hear the click-clack of the computer keys
as my fingers fly across them
eager to tell the world what I hear