Lulu_D

They don't think I notice

They don't think I notice how stingy we're becoming:

They don't think I notice the reluctance to use the propane heat.

They don't think I notice how cold it is when I crawl out of bed every morning.

I want to know how it feels to lie in your bed and stare at the ceiling.

I want to know how your sweatshirt would fit over my shoulders.

I want to be a melody stuck in your head.

I have 2 brothers

One is 11

and one is 3.

My house is never

ever

quiet.

I used to want an older sister.

To borrow clothes from.

To talk to about boys.

To show me how to put on make up.

It’s getting hard to tell apart

My head from hell,

My melting heart:

A puddle on my driveway,

A stain upon my shirt.

Please just run away —

I don’t want you getting hurt.

in the beam of headlights

a flash of motion darts across dark asphalt.

brakes slam,

a breath catches in the throat. 

and the stillness of a stopped car