In Another Life

I stare at your beautiful face,
at your wide smile underneath freckled cheeks,
at your unknowing blue eyes, filled with glimering stars,
hear the way your laugh sounds as it bounces through the hall,
and a million memories flash through my mind
that never really happpened
of my hand in yours,
secrets whispered between classes,
clandestine truths hanging in the breeeze.
Us lying on a beach somewhere,
the sky the color of cornflowers,
watching the world go by as our pinkies intertwine,
ever so slowly, but enough to set my world on fire.
Movie nights full of garlic knot pizza
and laughter
I'd belt my heart out to all the musicals,
which would annoy you
but eventually you'd join in
and the night would ring out with off-key harmonies
the sound of our voices, mingling together as one.
I'd find you shooting hoops one day, outside your house,
I wouldn't want to join in but
your smile always wins me over
so you'd teach me techniques I'd probably forget the next day
but I'd be fine with it, because I love the look on your face
when you're focused.

For a moment, I can forget that none of this happened
that it's just a draft in my mind, like all of the stories I never finished,
all of the dreams blown astray by a turning tide.
For a second--no, a fraction of one--
I can believe that we're more than two strangers passing by each other in crowded hallways
abuzz with chatter that seems to fade when I meet your eyes.
I wish on an eyelash, blow a dandelion, pick petals,
all of it futile, turning my mind into a graveyard of lost hope, love long overdue.
But, just to get me by,
I dream that in another life, we were something.
In another life,
we lay on the beach
and watched movies
and shot hoops
and fell in love.
But in this life,
we never will.

x
star
(i'm yours, still
even though i can't be)
x26x63x

 

star

NH

15 years old

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