the fractured girl

a few days ago

i ran home from the bus stop

soaked through and shivering

under a thunderous sky

my thoughts dissolving into rain

lightning pulsing in the air

threading through the coarse strands

of my hair

and some kind of wildfire consumes me

moving across my skin

yet never truly touching it

collapse

face down on my bed

fingers and toes curled into the fabric

belly pressing into the rain soaked sheets

my nose deep into the pillow

my mind incandescent

heat pressing behind my eyes

my thoughts threaten to overflow

and leave my bloated body

a swollen, restless tide

strained and frayed

beneath the weight of the atmosphere

my sheets heavy with warm red blood

the butterflies have fled

into some unreachable distance

and i rise up

or fall

either way

suspended somewhere in between

it doesn’t matter

either way i end up nowhere

alone

unmoored

gone

nothing