C-L-S

“It is common to experience physical sensations such as 

butterflies in the stomach, 

racing heart, 

sweating, 

This year feels … 

different. 

Like there’s anticipation 

hanging in the air. 

This year feels … 

scary. 

Like there’s so much 

uncertainty 

I have a secret

It’s getting harder to hide

I love you so much

It hurts inside

I have a secret

When I 

Hear you talk

About your distant

Boyfriend

I feel lost and sad and…

Dear World, 

I am teenager. I am on the cusp of life, a time when my entire life is ahead of me yet I am beginning to feel as if some parts of it are behind me. 

I learned to swim

When I was young

I learned

Freestyle

Breastroke

And butterfly

Now here I am

Years later

And all I know

Is how to sink

How to drown

How to go deeper

They were so awful to me,

And yet

They seemed to care.

They manipulated,

Twisted,

Hurt,

And destroyed me.

And yet I can't 

Seem to let them go.

Even knowing

How badly they could