moonriseee

It’s 10 pm; the moon trickles through the big window above my bed and I feel a strong hand rub my back. A sweet, familiar voice draws me awake and out of bed.

Once upon a time,

There was a little girl

Barely above the age of 7

Forcing her eyes

To stay open

Awaiting the new year

The little girl

Was excited

She believed

Everything would work out

When I was little, we lived in Philly. Seven hours from where we live now, eight counting the time allotted for rest stops. And a little ways down the sidewalk from our house was this tree.

It ended with roses.

I process the funeral in snatches.

Glimpses, even.

I see my family spilling out into the cemetery

Long-lost cousins twice-removed,

Great granduncles,

With the crashing tide,

And wisps of wind, 

Rain melts all there was. 

And all that will ever be. 

As water rises in the sea. 

It's been a long time since I have felt truly at ease with my friends

Since I've been able to laugh freely, smile easily, and be unapologetically myself

But now I have found people who make me feel accepted and celebrated