Scarry Night

And Yet We Blame the Rain

all day the rain pelts the earth 

our feet do the same

and yet we still blame the rain



Outside These Raindrops

For the first time in weeks, 

I have picked up a computer.

For the first time in weeks,

I have written words.

For the first time in weeks,

I have begun to climb out 

Some things in the world
just click,
they just fit together
as one half of a pie
would with the other.
They get tossed
and turned
and thrown around the world,
until they find their place.
Sitting on my small,

There are moments 
when words don't reach my tongue.
They follow the map of my body,
surviving the trek,
increasing in speed,
in power,
just to get caught in my throat,
scratching,
grasping for the freedom

I used to get excited for being older. 
I looked forward to having my own bank account,
to having my own phone. 
And now that I have these things,
my excitement has faltered. 
After school,

One day,
I drive,
for the very first time. 
I step out of my house,
jitters.
I linger through my driveway,
jitters, jitters.
I walk to the driver side door,
so 
so 
so many jitters.