Poetry

I don't know you

I want to

but not yet.

I know you are more useful to me as a faraway rival

of extraordinary difficulty

than as a friend right now

I also know I won't have a choice next year.

We hold hands and they call us lovebirds,

But they are too colorful and noticeable,

Not nearly strong enough as your grip,

As your hands around my waist,

Keeping me from falling (but it's already too late.)

One day I hope to leave

this world encapsulated by a wall far too high for my eyes

to reach.

Looking up is an exercise

that twists my heart in the process

because when did movements 

for old times' sake

is such a pretty sentiment

like

let's do it

for the love

that used to be here

for the memories that used to be young

let's do it for the time

i've always loved the smell of paper

and i get to decide where everything gets to go.

when i hear a sound

i'd rather see what it is 

than cower and wonder 

what it could be.

for a tortoise, i think i beat the hare. he ran from everything yet always won. whether it was to give up friends or to just be right. now i pass him as he naps on the side of the road. i need a nap too, though.

Lavender walls

Stare at me

Painted a lifeless white,

I swore they were purple.

I try to grasp onto any memory 

That I could think of.

 they say I used to be so free,
 as if I set that freedom down
 somewhere careless
 and forgot to pick it back up.

Sometimes I wonder

If you remember

That night?

It was dark and light all at once

Fire lit

A volleyball we couldn’t see

A game we couldn’t play

People I didn’t know

I could be with 

Pull the laces tighter

A waist of 5 inches

No more

Get a ring on that finger

From a man with honor

Or you won't get your father's money

I'll go breathe the mist 

When coals cool into the fog 

Blocking the mind's sight.

If someone is up there 

I thought you should know 

I’m in love 

A dove soars over the mist 

God if you're up there 

You should know I’m flying free