You spend most of your childhood wanting to grow up. You dream of all the things you'll do, the people you'll meet, the freedom of a life where you are the captain of your own ship. Only to be met with the reality that a ship can be pretty lonely without a crew. Faced with the waves of an open and expansive sea, the wind waiting to blow my sail any which way I choose, I am afraid. I want only to crawl beneath the deck and wait for the ever-present tide to pull me under. The depths of the ocean a respite from the choices that lie above.
I stare behind me at the shores of my past, wondering if I will ever be able to return. To a time when every one was home. When I was able to stare out my window, the stars glowing above my head, leading to somewhere. A time when I knew the horizon would go on forever, before I realized everything must end.
I will travel to distant lands, unheard of to me. Be so amazed that I forget I ever had a home. But the sand on every shore will tug at something deep in my heart. It will say "you belong to somewhere."
Posted in response to the challenge Growing Up.
Comments
The ship, and being afloat at sea, is such a fitting metaphor for growing up. So much of what you touched on -- the loneliness of sailing alone, the feeling that the wind can pull you in any direction, the sands of a homeland that is your past -- was spoken of with such affecting language, and really resonated with me.
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