Writing

Little do we know

everyone is next

I am next

glints in their eyes give away their fear

help us

Again?

I’ll say it again

I will say it a million times over

I will say it till you believe it

I will say it till you fall asleep

The first time the words touched my ears

I sobbed,

stricken on the ground.

The second time,

I cried 

and was inconsolable.

The third time

do I like myself?

no.

do I accept myself?

no.

do I appreciate myself?

no.

yet do I wish I was someone else?

no.

She says, I’m scared, 
and I don’t lie, 
I am too. 

Scared in the quiet, 
scared of how much 
this matters. 

Except for one moment: 
when I’m beside her. 

I almost said forever,
the way people do
when they want the moment to stop moving.

But I know I’m temporary
in ways you aren’t.

And loving you
has been the happiest
I’ve ever felt.