I’m not a painter 

But if I was 

I would paint masterpieces 

And tell a story within each frame 

I would create a piece of art 

So beautiful you can’t tear your eyes off it

I’m not a dancer

But if I was

I would dance until my feet hurt

My body being the voice that I don’t have

I would twirl until the world was a blur

And so were people's fears

I’m not a musician

But if I was

I would pluck the strings and hit the keys

For as long as my fingers would let me

I would write and compose for ages

And make a sound

A song

For love

I’m not a singer

But if I was

I would sing the words of people

Who aren’t listened to

I would weave my thoughts together

To create something that dances in your head

And floats among the stars

I’m not a speaker

But if I was

I would speak with the power of the wind

And the delicacy of the little white flowers

I would tell a tale of loss and love

And tell the world to hear my voice

The thing is though

I’m not

And there is no

But if I was

I’m just not

But I like to read the story in the paintings

And lose my fears as a dancer twirls

I like to listen to the sound of love

And hear a voice that holds many others

I like to feel the words that hold such power

Rush through me in the shape of a story about love and loss

So although I may not be those things

I get to watch them and hear them

And most importantly

I get to wonder

But what if I was?

sometimes i wish i could forget everyone i ever met

and lie down on my back in the ocean

only feel the noiseless miles between my toes

minnows kissing my skin

and nothing else

sometimes i wish i could forget everything i ever lived

like dragonflies sitting on echinacea

and then dying under snow stars

to bloom spirals on my grandma's palm

i wish i could get rid of you, write without you, dream without you, laugh without you, die without you

but 

how special you are when part of you becomes me

how special i am when part of me becomes you

Time when the sun has brushed --

Only the crests of great waves,

A grey stillness approaches from the east --

Advancing gently.

Across the world we All prepare for nightfall,

and soon the moon will watch -- as

we fall asleep forever

Spring 

is more than a season

it lingers in what you feel,

see, taste, smell, hear.

Spring is a sensation, 

a quiet awakening

from the brutal sting 

of winter. 

Spring 

feels 

like hope 

like a steady calm. 

The atmosphere 

is light and sweet

an inexplicable warmth

that fills the air.

Spring 

looks like 

a sunny yellow

a soft, grassy green 

a sky blue

a vibrant, flowery pink

all at the same time

a burst of colors 

blended so well. 

Spring 

tastes like 

fresh food 

strawberries and carrots 

rhubarbs and asparagus

fresh from the ground 

sweet and tart and ripe and bitter

everything all at once

it tastes like joy.

Spring 

smells like 

fresh grass after rainfall

a soft, breezy vanilla

light, earthy wood 

a sweet citrus 

a flowery breeze 

an essence that can never

be bottled up 

and sold. 

Spring 

sounds like 

bees buzzing 

birds flitting around 

spreading their sweet chirp

to all those who will listen.

The croaking 

of jade-green frogs, emerging 

just for this weather.
 

Spring

drifts softly through the air

and leaves a quiet kind of peace

still more than just a season

spring is colors, warmth, joy,

 sweet smells, a gentle buzz.

Spring 

is renewal.

A fresh start.

As  a child

she would sit alone

always watching the others

playing the day away

while she never had the confidence

                                                     to join them

When the class went on a trip

to see the most beautiful performance

she knew this is how she would escape

                                                                     herself

Finally in school, the class play came around

when she stepped on stage to audition

it finally clicked

            This is where I’m meant to be.

The spotlight shone so brightly

it warmed her face with joy

None of her classmates thought she would be able to speak like this

but when she did everyone knew

          This is who she’s meant to be.

As the years went on

she grew to love performing

dancing 

    singing

           acting

                    music

all kinds of art

But outside of the stage

she would shrink back into the corner

just herself and her stories

and watching the world play out

As she stepped into this new chapter of her life

being the introvert that she is she was nervous

College. What am I going to do?

But she did what she always did

                                        She performed

She performed like never before

Always getting exactly the part she wanted

Gliding across the stage with perfection

She graduated top of the class

and went to the 

             glittering

                shimmering

                            sparkling

Broadway

She shone like never before

The lights warmed her skin

The roar of the crowd made her smile

The performances took her to another world

                                             away from her timid self

But at home

or anywhere off stage 

she was lonely

There were no more characters to keep her company 

No more stories to lift her up

Until one day

               she spoke up

and shared about her loneliness

No one had really heard her speak before

so no one really listened

except for one

One who was also lonely

Another introverted performer

escaping the outside world

that they could not control

So the other lonely performer pushed through the fear

              and spoke to her

She listened with empathy

about how he too felt trapped

They spoke whenever they could

Laughing

       Crying

           Dancing 

                    Singing

                           Performing

Together

They told each other everything

And eventually

they fell in love

And they realized

That the world would continue to bring them down

And sometimes it felt too big

But they also knew

That they could overcome it

And they didn’t have to be popular or talkative offstage to prove it

All they had to do

All they had to be 

Was themselves

And with that 

Nothing could bring them down.

I wish I had known you when we were younger

With our sun-kissed cheeks and lopsided grins

When we were filled with joy and mindless wonder

At summer church camp singing off-tune hymns

Peanut butter and jellies on the beach

Running barefoot through those white sandy dunes

Climbing trees, it would be your hand which I’d reach

Among the leaves on those sunny afternoons

Sticky popsicle melt trailing down our wrists

While we caught fireflies in the late evenings

And I truly wish all of that exists

Not merely as my sentimental feelings

Because I did not know you way back then

So I settle for loving you now, my friend

Mom. 
There's this girl I've been avoiding. 

I've known her for a long time, 
And we were close some time ago. 
But at some point we just grew apart. 

It's mostly my fault, I think. 
I started prioritizing other things over her 
Which I thought were more important. 

But I saw her again this morning,
In the mirror.
She's changed a lot since I last met her.

She's not quiet anymore.
She's emotional.
She has a sharp tongue and lies easily.

I never noticed these changes happening,
But here they were:
She grew up.

Right before my eyes.

what do you do when you cross the sea without me? 

on this warm night, I stand outside in the blue dark. 

I wear a bathrobe over my pajamas 

and old crocs that are faded purple 

I look to the clear sky above 

the stars are bright 

the moon is just a sliver 

and from the west I see a plane.

it cuts through the sky like a knife

and if I listen close, I can hear it whir 

it carries you far away from me. 

it's strangely peaceful, 

and mystically bittersweet

to watch you dive into the darkness shrouding the east. 

I lay down in my driveway 

letting the night coat me in feeling

I begin to wave at the sky

to wave at you

as if you'll see me from 30,000 feet

out that tiny window

if you even got a window seat. 

I miss you, even though you've only just left

I know it will hurt even more

the day you leave forever

and cross the sea one final time

never coming back

but for now

I feel something more powerful than pain

this is love.