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I'm often told, "You must be so cold," when someone sees me, or "How are you not sweating in that?" I don't feel cold; I feel ashamed. It's as if I'm hiding the parts of myself that I can't fix when they ask how I'm not hot out in the warm sun.

The Need 

The want 

The feel of it all

My brain fights with my heart like two strays

To push yourself into nothing

"You need to be the best"

Over and over till I give in

Study study study

 My little girl's body ran after wild animals, not caring about if I had to look cool or if I got all sweaty. Now I check my hair before going out and make sure I spray my perfume too many times to hide the smell of sweat or odor.