Lulu_D

At school we draw in the margins of our notebook paper

and toy with the idea of moving to Australia. 

We look up the latest news in between classes, knowing that

the teachers will think we're addicted to our phones.

note: partially inspired by Mary Oliver's "Wild Geese" 

        and  for my mom 

i want you to sit and stare at the glistening horizon. 

a lesbian couple on my bus home from school 

a man in a punk battle jacket on the street 

my mother's female CEO group chat blowing up 

four of my teachers taking the following day off 

I have given a lot of my faith away with purple ribbons

Our fingers brush when my hope is taken from me, and I expect no more than a jolt in my stomach, slight discomfort at having been accidentally touched

I had an idea

I wanted to spill all my anger into the page

so why is it always so hard to write 

I woke in the middle of the night

Oblivious to the pain that would come in 4 hours 

When I woke up to my dad next to my bed a sad look on his face

My world shattered.