Love is a paradoxical thing.

I want desperately to be loved.

I want to wake up to a "good morning, my favorite person" text.

I want the last thing I see at night to be a little red heart emoji.

Even with my friends, I'm alone.

They date. They love each other.

They don't think I notice

They don't think I notice how stingy we're becoming:

They don't think I notice the reluctance to use the propane heat.

They don't think I notice how cold it is when I crawl out of bed every morning.