Identity Crisis

How am I supposed to know

what love is like

when I'm questioning love itself

when I'm questioning me

the world

this point in time that has

rubbed the fear

frustration

anxiety

into my skin

suffocating

when I can barely center myself

or look deep inside to find

me?

The idea of

"love"

has been around since,

well,

humans, and even before

so why

why am I over-complicating it all?

When everyone else

has their futures paved out

ahead of them

topics and people to focus on

when I question myself

but feel guilty for focusing on me

when other people are being evicted

deported

arrested

just because of stereotypes

wormed into people's minds

thought processes

and so

I have decided

that I am only 13

I do not pay taxes

I do not have a job

so therefore

I am 13

I do not pay taxes

I do not have a job

I do not have to have my future perfectly planned out in a straight line ahead of my feet

so I can have dotted lines

squiggly lines

flashing lines

because I am still figuring myself out

and that takes time.