Poetry

All the little things

Add up

Matter

A lot to me

Everything

We met you

For the first time in years

You

All three of you

Are in college

Have lives

Away from us

My tears taste of memories,

slipping from my eyes,

replaying on my cheeks,

leaving a trail of our past on my lips,

tasting of the bitter-sweet moments of us,

and finally, 

silently, 

I don't think you're a waste of space,

I'll give you my room and my pillow

As long as you make the bed afterwards,

And close the windows to keep the rain out. 

I don't think your not enough,

they’ve seen me in passing

without even realising

that hope is what makes me

able to stand underneath the californian sun

hope lets me feel

the ground beneath our feet

the breeze against my cheek

my hair falls like clumps of tears

ready to be set free,

like chains held over my head.

i tied my hair into knots

of familial expectations,

the knot’s been untied,

and the cage has opened

I wish I could be you.

Running to your room

Plugging your ears

Whenever there's a scary part of a movie

And coming back out in time

To see the happy ending -

Closing your eyes

Covering your face

This man

With a family who loves him

But can't help him

Because he needs to help himself first

This man

Drunk on hatred for himself

For this world

"Hopeless", they all say

With their eyes

I feel like I lost all the time

I once thought I had

Looking at you

Even though you look the same

The gray of your hair

And the change of mine

Tells me time has truly passed

I am sad

sad to not have weekly meetings with you

I am nervous

nervous of what I'll be doing this weekend

I am excited

excited to show off, to show my friends and family this tradition

I am apprehensive

Our last meeting

I rehearsed my part

I read my speech

you looked on with pride

I'm proud, too

I can sing and read in a different language

from ancient scroll with no vowels that sort of smells bad

The sun didn’t kiss these boys

It hugged them

The way you would with your best friend before

Leaving for a long time

It hugged them and

It made their skin the color of a caramel

And their hair like the sand

One message 

An Instagram notification in my inbox from an unfollowed account 

I never get DMed

Opening was the worst possible choice I could've made