Poetry

I walk through empty streets that I don’t go through anymore.

The thought of you just caves in, Even though we haven’t met. My heart is full of your name even though I don’t know it.

I was once told “There’s no use in helping someone whose problems are on the rim of the cup” I never understood that saying, but I knew that my own vase was overflowing.

crying over a simple email 

the lasts build a lump in my throat 

last time beaming onstage 

signing yearbooks 

wearing a stiff blue skirt 

Rain.

Laughter.

Smiles.

Swimsuits and twister.

Getting soaked just for fun.

This is girlhood.

This is happiness.

This is freedom.

Gentle waves curl over themselves

Like blue and white ribbons

Twirling together to captivate the eyes

The sky is in flames

Shades of orange and red

Reach through the blue

My watch did not enjoy my run in the rain.

This morning before the other humans had stirred,

I woke to the ringing of an alarm that was not my own,

and saw the irresistible rain.

Now my watch doesn't tell the date.

I don't

Open at your words

Your touch

I don't

Listen to

Anyone anymore.

I am completely in my head.

I know we don't have time for this mess.

I do it anyway.

I don't

Pay attention.

i hope that you rest easy as the world

tumbles down into fire

for you did everything you could

& we didn't do enough. it was never

your fate to carry the failures of

common sense & education, but now

"I don't care," I say.

Don't care.

Don't.

Do not.

Don't want to.

Can't.

Scared to.

You look at me.

Ask, "What about your friends?"

Yes, what about them, self?

I was...what was I?

I was happy.

I was free.

I had such a rush of a year

That I forgot...everything else.

Full steam ahead

Days blurring

Like a train.

Plowing through.

I warned myself.

They are smiling,

Lips stretched up, with a slight crinkle of their eyes,

They are listening,

Nodding along, making hums of acknowledgement,

They are happy,