School is the worst for this. Mine began a no cell phone policy that no one follows and it's so strange to me. Like can yall not get off your phones for eight hours? And they'll be playing video games and things on their computers. Last year a SIXTH GRADER got caught watching p**n... in class! I definitely have my fair share of screen-time but it's wild
So atmospheric! You've really captured the essence of fall, its yin and yang, both its light and dark extremes, while still maintaining a sense of lightness and whimsy. Using "savor" in the last line after making references to ice cream and cooking ties it all together.
I don't think you scrambled too many thoughts! Your poem follows a logical flow from when you were young to where you are now, and who you want to be. If you want to draw it all together more succinctly, you could introduce a piece of your last stanza, about wanting to live with no regrets, earlier in the poem, maybe. (P.S. Short girls unite!)
Omg, Thank you!!
That's such a great idea! Thanks for the advice! :)
School is the worst for this. Mine began a no cell phone policy that no one follows and it's so strange to me. Like can yall not get off your phones for eight hours? And they'll be playing video games and things on their computers. Last year a SIXTH GRADER got caught watching p**n... in class! I definitely have my fair share of screen-time but it's wild
I have no words for how good this poem is.
Thanks!
The colors you used are so vibrant and attention-grabbing. This piece is loud in its beauty!
The color of the bark appears almost black against the brightness of the yellow, making for such a striking contrast! Is amarillo the type of tree?
So atmospheric! You've really captured the essence of fall, its yin and yang, both its light and dark extremes, while still maintaining a sense of lightness and whimsy. Using "savor" in the last line after making references to ice cream and cooking ties it all together.
I don't think you scrambled too many thoughts! Your poem follows a logical flow from when you were young to where you are now, and who you want to be. If you want to draw it all together more succinctly, you could introduce a piece of your last stanza, about wanting to live with no regrets, earlier in the poem, maybe. (P.S. Short girls unite!)
Love the color contrast between the tree and wall!!