Poetry

My ankle hurts

because I stepped funny

at the very beginning

of my very own bat mitzvah party.

I might've twisted it

I don't really know

but I can't sit a certain way

otherwise the pain returns

sarcastic jabs and quippy lines

I hope you know I usually don't mean it

and I know my best is not enough

but that's what being human is all about

I don't have to worry about perfection

I will overcome compulsions

It

was

terrifying.

Nothing more

nothing less

it could only be described as that.

I was shaking, actually

I don't know why I was so scared of doing this

Fireflies and sun

Thunderstorms that shake the house

Summer has returned

I'm opening my phone

To nothing 

No messages, no emails, no missed calls,

All I'm getting is radio silence 

The sinking feeling in my heart returned

The one where you know something is wrong

To me,

The words hope

And light

Are interchangeable;

To me,

Perhaps it is hope

That will let us see clearly

your mother/ hacked together skeleton wings into two-part pieces/ bleeding stars, you thought/ neurons fizzing out/ you had all the time in the the universe/ your eyes dripped down/ the back of your spacesuit/ a so-called prodigy ghost/ acid smoke

Long, exhausted bars of light in my window
Chase away the late night that came before them,
And prime me for the next one.

Stinging my eyes

The tears come

Pouring down

Relentlessly.

Still breathing 

Still warm

Yet dead 

To me

And me alone.

Grief floods me

Again 

I'm drowning 

You say you want someone real,

like every second we spent together was a dream,

or a nightmare,

I don't know how you think of us.

You say you want someone real,

Our fathers

Mothers 

Daughters

Sons

Have fought 

When there is no time to sit

When there’s no more patience 

For our world 

We stand 

And fight

And win

From the beginning of creation,

Women have been underneath the growing nation.

We sat and were forced to watch for decades,

Underneath what men called “the shade.”

But submission is temporary.