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Everything I love

most in the world

many things - an

elemental

table of feeling - a

train to somewhere else.

I always try to be sunshine.

Happiness incarnate.

Funny and easygoing.

Helping my friends feel good.

Making sure nobody worries about me.

But sometimes I just want to escape it.

I’ve always been a cookie cutter girl.

pressed into shapes I never liked.

Rolled and folded into the perfect form.

My face and body configured

to make me look appetizing.

There’s a place I want to live

And someone I want to love

I want to live in a place

So full of joy

That it fills me too

So full of people

Confetti rains down  as flying squirrels fill the screen

You read your acceptance letter and I'm filled with overwhelming happiness

But I'm not ready

I wish I was underwater, my thoughts drowned out by silence.

The world above me muted.

The water cooling my skin.

Surrounded by that velvety liquid we call water.

That miracle.

Oh, how I wish I were underwater.