Fainting Goat

Someday there’ll be holes in these walls

Where pictures of you once hung from thumbtacks 

And the little squares of wall they used to take up 

Will crumble and rot.

We made a bet when we were sixteen.

Actually, you were fifteen.

I knew I’d lose. I did it so you would continue to speak to me. I liked seeing you care about something healthy.

Is that okay to say?

Sometimes I worry that I will get treated differently because of my differences.

I know that it probably won't happen in school with teachers

but you can't stop kids from doing anything 

not in middle school

It's not all the grownups, 

But it's too many. 

Nothing is how it should be.  

The world is heating.  

The government collapsing. 

Yet we, 

We are only overreacting. 

It feels like drowning in expectations while trying to convince the world I can swim. 

I’m always performing.  

The pressure is suffocating. 

Girlhood is texting your crush because it's late at night and you don't know any better. 

Girlhood is staring way too hard at the prettiest girl in class.