Claire

I promised you I would always stay,

swore on a bond I thought would never break.

Then came a time everything conflict

but I meant every word, every bit of it.

i’m shaking. 

i’m in tears. 

i’m hugging my pillow so tight i can barely feel my arms, 

my heart is pounding in my ears 

They tell me I can trust them with anything.

They tell me not to hide.

They tell me that they won't tell anyone.

But...

They never think about why I can't trust them.

They never think about why I hide.

I promise you I care

This I know for sure.

I promise you I’m here

Just maybe not to stay.

I promise you I’m fine

Just in my own way.

I promise you I’m trying

I swear I always have been.

I am a teenager

My life is not simple

I am traumatized and scarred

And doing my best

But it seems like adults can’t see this

All they see is an anxious little girl

Who doesn’t seem to care

If only I’d never met you

If only I had been stronger

If only I had seen sooner

Just how abusive you are

If only I hadn’t let you

Turn my life to ruin

If only I hadn’t tried